Mental Health Awareness Month // My Experience with Therapy
In case you didn’t know, May is Mental Health Awareness Month! This monthly observance was started in 1949 by Mental Health America and aims to raise awareness and educate the public about mental illnesses and strategies for obtaining help and resources. This month is also about reducing the stigma and misconceptions people have about mental health and mental illness.
Since May is Mental Health Awareness Month, I thought that this would be a great time to share my experience with therapy.
I started going to therapy in the spring/summer of 2016. I was dealing with the aftermath of a breakup as well as personal changes. I was graduating college and about to move back home, and it all just felt like a crushing weight on my shoulders. I didn’t know how to emotionally and mentally deal with it all, and my mom actually threw out the idea of going to see somebody. I had been going back and forth on that idea, but it took somebody else noticing my struggles and verbalizing it to give me that extra push.
I found a therapist in Bellingham a few months before I was scheduled to move back home. As much as I wanted it to work right off the bat and to feel connected to the therapist, I have to be honest and say that I didn’t feel that way. This is not uncommon for many people, not connecting with the first therapist that they see. It may feel a little discouraging to start the therapy process off on that foot, but just know, you’re not alone in that experience.
I only saw that therapist twice. The first time was when I poured out everything I had be dealing with, and the second session, some time had passed and I thought I was feeling better. I foolishly thought that after one session, and some upswing in my life, I was good to go. Maybe all I needed was to talk it out and get a good cry in. I genuinely thought that life was fine again and that there was nothing else I needed to discuss or work through. I think part of me thought that I was right as rain, but I also think that I didn’t fully connect with her and was looking for any reason not to go see her again.
After moving back home, I quickly realized that I should continue going to therapy. I was still having a hard time dealing with difficult emotions and felt like I was not in a good mental head space. I had verbalized my feelings, but I hadn’t done any work to get to the root of any of my problems or work towards gaining the tools to fix/grow from them. I did some research online and found a therapist in my area that accepted my insurance and specialized in the areas I needed to work on. I started seeing her in October 2016 and I’ve continued seeing and talking to her up to now in 2021.
I have gone through it in therapy. I have cried, I have sobbed, I have truly worked myself emotionally raw. With my therapist, I have talked about and worked through some of the worst times and lowest moments in my life. But for my own growth and well-being, that’s what I had to do. I needed to get uncomfortable if there was any chance of reaching a better mental head space.
I’m a strong supporter of therapy and believe that everybody, at some point in their life, should take advantage of the positives of counseling. Whether that’s individually, as a couple, or as a family, there are so many upsides to having a safe space to feel seen and heard.
I have learned an immense amount about myself. I have gained better tools to deal with stress, anxiety, and those low moments. Personally, I’m at a point in my life when I don’t feel like I need to have a set therapy schedule. I have worked damn hard to get to where I’m at with my mental health and I’m really proud of myself for that.
This isn’t to say that I’ve “completed” therapy or I never have to go back. Not every day is sunshine and rainbows. There may come a time in my life where I have to start returning to regularly scheduled sessions and have to work myself emotionally raw again. And I’m OK with that. But because I started therapy, and I took that jump and stuck with it even in the hardest moments, I’m in a much better place than when I started.
I believe that it’s so important for people to continue to break down the stigma of asking for help when it comes to your mental health. I’m very lucky that I have friends who feel comfortable talking to me about their experiences and are always open to listening to mine. I also feel grateful to have a significant other and family who have been nothing but supportive throughout my therapy process. Not everybody is as lucky to have a support system like mine, which is why I do not take it for granted one bit.
We should never be afraid to say when we’re not doing well and we should never be afraid to prioritize our mental well-being. Let this month be a time for you focus a little more on your mental health and if you need therapy or to ask for help, let May be the time when you take the step for a better tomorrow.
At one point in the last year or so, my therapist said to me, “You’ve come a really long way.” She said is sweetly and softly with a smile. And it was a jolt that I wasn’t expecting. For me, therapy was a gradual process, where I didn’t necessarily see results overnight. But as time went on, I started making positive changes to my mindset and life. Having my therapist say that to me made me reflective. When I started therapy in 2016, I felt so incredibly shitty and I was in such a low place with my mental health. Over the years, with the help of therapy, I’ve pulled myself out of that hole and like she said, I’ve come a really long way.
If you are looking for more resources relating to mental health or Mental Health Awareness Month specifically, here are some resources to start with:
National Alliance on Mental Illness