New Year's Resolution 2019
Hello 2019, fancy seeing you here! 2018 flew by right before my eyes and I honestly don’t know where the time went. Seems like just yesterday Andrew and I were ringing in January 1st at the Pacific Science Center, watching fireworks shoot off the Space Needle, and drinking champagne and kissing when the clock struck midnight. Now here we are, a whole year later and with a whole new year laid out in front of us!
The past couple of years I’ve written a blog post about my “resolutions”: The Year for Me and The Year for Experiences. In last year’s blog post, I talked about how I wanted to branch out in 2018 and push myself when it came to experiences, people, and traveling. And I’ve got to say, I think I accomplished that! I traveled to LA with my girlfriends in the spring, took a couple summer camping trips, and went to Boston with Andrew in September to visit friends. I left a job, got a new job, left that job, and am now in a job that I truly enjoy. I worked to solidify some of my important friendships and worked on being open to new ones as well. And one of the most important things, I fell in love! I’m so happy I got to spend my Year of Experiences with Andrew by my side and I’m so thankful to have shared so many 2018 experiences together.
So, here we are, on the cusp of 2019 and I’ve been thinking what I want to work on in this new year. I’ve spent a long time pondering it and have come to the conclusion that I want this year to be The Year of Self-Worth.
For the most part, I’ve been a pretty confident person for most of my life. But for me, self-worth doesn’t just come in the form of personal, outwardly confidence. I see it in my actions, how I take care of myself mentally, how I treat my body, and how I interact with others. And I want this next year to be a fulfillment in all those avenues.
To elaborate a little further…
One day I was listening to the podcast “Armchair Expert” with Dax Shepard featuring his wife, Kristen Bell, and she was talking about “esteemable acts”. Dax continued by saying that many believe that we gain self-esteem and worth through accomplishments, but what boosts his self-esteem are esteemable acts, such as taking care of himself and others. I was fascinated by this conversation between the two of them and it resonated with me. That’s what I want for myself. I want to take care of myself and others and for myself personally, I know that those actions will bring me a great sense of fulfillment and worth.
Beyond my personal actions, I want to value and respect my body. I stopped playing competitive sports was around the same time that social media was starting to grow exponentially. That meant that as my body was changing and adjusting, I was hit with a barrage of perfectly filtered photos of women with perfectly seeming bodies. I didn’t look like those women, I would never look like those women. And if they’re what are deemed beautiful, what am I? In this day and age, it is very, very easy to compare your life to others and I found myself doing that more than I would’ve liked to. My hope going into 2019 is that I’ll be gentler to my body in the way I speak to it and treat it. I want to continue to strive for healthy goals with my fitness and food choices, but I also want to take more time to appreciate all that my body does and look in the mirror and instead of critiquing things, say to myself, damn I look good!
To continue off of that, I think actively taking some time away from social media will also help towards my Year of Self-Worth. Even though I work in marketing and social media is a big aspect of my job, I don’t always love it for personal use. I want to stop taking social media at face value when I know full well that people only post their happy moments and that social media is not real life. Anybody can create a narrative for their life that they’re able to portray to their followers, whether it’s real or not. It also seems like nowadays worth is measured in how many likes you get, how many followers you have, and what kind of social media presence you possess. I’m sorry, but that’s fucking bullshit. Why should the amount of likes I get on a photo depict my worth? I won’t let it. This next year, I will actively strive to keep the mindset that with whatever I choose to broadcast via my social platforms, I will not let its engagement with others affect how I view myself.
2018 offered me so much and I feel like I’ve grown so much as a person. My experiences have molded me into a strong, happy person and I’m so thankful for this year in that sense. I am very excited for what 2019 has in store!